Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Corn dogs and microwaves

When I was a child I had several places that were wonderlands for me; Sam's is one of them. Think about it when entering this magical place the first thing that greets you is big screen T.V.s, jewelery counters, and tables upon tables of clothes. Scattered around this enormous place are nice little old ladies making little pizzas, cheese filled pretzels, and maybe some samples of cookies with M&M's in them. (I have a friend that specifically takes her child on Saturdays around lunchtime because the child could eat lunch while she shopped) It's always bothered me that I could buy a 2 carat diamond ring and a lifetime supply of peanut butter in the same place or a big screen T.V. and an economy size box of condoms.(That many condoms can be purchased I have done it and I have no shame in admitting that!) I compare it to a comedian that used to say why do they sell hot tubs at the state fair? When did a hot tub become an impulse buy? Seriously! Well the only reason that I write this little rant is to preface the story of what my blog is actually about. Also, let me say that going into Sam's without a specific list is not smart because suddenly a box of 50 Jimmy Dean sausage biscuits seems like a smart buy. So, I was driving home trying to figure out how I just blew $200 bucks on nothing, and my daughter Madison started the "I'm hungry" gripe, and I said we will have corn dogs when we get home. Arriving home with 3 children I begin to unload the van, the kids are running around like inmates who have taken over the asylum, so I don't need to tell you my nerves are shot! I have a habit a not unloading the groceries immediately upon getting home because I usually go hide in the bathroom to regain my sanity from the trip I have just taken with my children for a few minutes. While in the bathroom I started to wipe down the counter top, and just have a minute to myself. Bad, bad move.... While I hid Andrew cut open the box of 50 State fair corn dogs and removed it from its package and put it in the microwave; pushed the numbers for 90 minutes and walked away expecting to hear the beep when it was done being cooked. Do you know what happens when I corn dog stick stays in a microwave to long? It starts smoking, and the corn dog begins to burn, and burn and even spark a little. I came out of my room and smoke is billowing out of the microwave and my smoke alarm begins to go nuts. Andrew starts screaming I didn't mean to! I'm hungry! AAAAAGH! I have no shame in saying I stayed in the bathroom to long or that my children on a regular basis divide and conquer me, but they are mine and the stories seem really funny now. haha! I still haven't figured out how to get the burnt smell out of the house before my husband gets home from work, because the "what the heck happened?" look he gets on his face when he walks through the door and is hit by the whiff of burnt anything makes me go crazy! Then, I find myself sounding like a yappy dog. I JUST NEEDED A MINUTED TO MYSELF! DREW GOT HUNGRY! HE BURNT THE CORN DOG! THE MICROWAVE IS FINE! IT WASN'T A REAL FIRE! Jon rolls his eyes, opens the microwave to check if the top of the microwave is black and then walks away with a totally baffled look on his face. I have to make sure I make a list before I go to Sam's I may still have some sausage biscuits at the bottom of my deep freezer! LOL Never a dull moment- ever. Next, I will write what Body soap and random spices from the cupboard smell like when mixed together. Lovely........

2 comments:

Betsy said...

I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE NEXT POST....you seriously need to write a book.

alice said...

My kids call Sam's 'Sample Saturdays'!! I will make sure to never set the Corn Dogs for too long!